Life Motherhood Parenting

Two Years a Mom

January 26, 2017

Seven hundred and thirty (730) days.

The number of days seems TOO MUCH and TOO LITTLE at the same time!

TOO MUCH – I could not believe it’s only been 730 days after all that has happened and how my daughter has grown so much!

-and yet-

TOO LITTLE – That moment when I held her in my arms for the first time remains so fresh to me. Time has huge wings.

Then I realized, the number of days would not matter anymore because it just keeps getting better, moving from one beautiful memory to the next. And one thing’s for sure – I won’t trade THIS for anything in the world.

THIS. MOTHERHOOD. It’s the best thing that happened to me in my 30 years of existence.

Being a mom has not only changed me physically (accept fatness forever) and emotionally (where do I even begin?), it has COMPLETELY changed my perspective of life. It has moved me mentally, spiritually, deep until the core of my values and principles. MOTHERHOOD HAS BROUGHT UPON ME A RENEWED SENSE OF PURPOSE.

At the beginning, the challenge is to survive and not be eaten alive by the entire situation. Especially for newbie moms. And then slowly, goals start to change and judgments start to fade. Fears and doubts will always be part of who we are now. But that’s okay. Because the fear and doubt often translates into pride, joy, and affection.

In the end, the ultimate goal is to make your child safe, healthy, and happy while staying rational and sane. Yes, sane, and whole. That’s the best thing about motherhood… No matter how much of yourself is given, you will always remain WHOLE. 🙂

I am EXTREMELY FAR from being a perfect mother but I know I try my best to be at least good enough for my child. I believe so does every mom I know. And with that, I would like to share five simple things I’ve learned with two years as a mom:

  1. TRUST YOUR INSTINCT

MATERNAL INSTINCT is a powerful tool we should never underestimate. If you feel like it’s better for your kid to stay home today, let her stay home. There might be a reason for it. You don’t have to follow it every single time but at least give it some consideration.

  1. DON’T OVERTHINK

Almost impossible to do right? ALL moms overthink, overdo, over-everything? Why? Because we are OVERflowing with love and care for our kids. But that’s NOT an excuse. Most of the time, overthinking complicates the situation. So stay calm and just focus on the positives. You’d be surprised at how SIMPLE some things can work out.

  1. TO EACH HIS (HER) OWN. NEVER COMPARE!

No matter how alike you think we are, sorry, we’re not! Every single mother in the planet has her own different circumstance. Not all working moms are the same, not all breastfeeding moms think alike, not all single moms have the same goals. Respect each other’s parenting decisions without a trace of judgment. Instead, use every varying situation as an example to learn from.

  1. MOTHERHOOD IS NOT A COMPETITION.

You can join Ms. Universe for all I care but please stop competing with me (or with other moms for that matter). Just because my daughter knows more words now, it doesn’t mean your daughter can’t be valedictorian in the future. Buying the biggest toy in the store or breastfeeding longer doesn’t make you a better mom than the other. And if you say you are being “imitated” or “copied”, well, be thankful! You must be doing something good right? There’s really NO competition because THE ONLY JUDGE HERE IS YOUR OWN CHILD, and as long as he/she is happy, you’re a winner. 🙂

Side story: I remember one time I asked a mom “friend” about this group/class. I already had an idea about it thru common friends but I just wanted to get more details. She immediately said it was just a “private” thing for “selected few” or just “a group of friends”. I was so tempted to expose her but I just laughed it off because I already knew she was just being competitive to the point of being childish and difficult. Oh well! Some moms need a little more understanding, that’s okay.

  1. PRAY AND TEACH YOUR CHILD TO PRAY.

With everything going on in the world, you can only do so much. You can guard your child with your life but there are far too many external factors we cannot control. And so, after everything said and done, we must always hope and believe in the grace and goodness of a Higher Being who will be our sanctuary (I say this in generic form to accommodate all forms of religion). Guidance from above will never cease to bring comfort and direction.

 

Finally I end my rambling with THANKSGIVING. Thank you to our Lord for allowing me to live this purpose. Thank you my dear husband for not just being a good father too but loving me and encouraging me every step of the way. Thank you to my own parents for being good examples and for being the best support system any new parent like myself needs. And finally, thank you, my child, for bringing out the best in me and keeping my heart full no matter how difficult life can be. Thank you for accepting my love and for showing me you love me back, because at this moment in my life, that is all that matters. 🙂

 

 

Two years a mom,

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